Friday, June 14, 2013

One of the SCARIEST Days Ever

First off I want to say, to anyone that has ever had a child go missing, I'm sorry.  Really, no parent should EVER have to experience that and the feeling that come with it.

May 31, 2013 around 1:00pm
I was inside working on laundry.  Tim was outside mowing the lawn.  Daniel and Chloe were playing outside with their cousin Carter.  Everything was fine.  I peeked out the window and saw all three kids jumping on the trampoline.  I went downstairs and got another load of laundry to start, went up and switched the laundry and then started folding some clothes.  Then, in walked Carter.  I looked out the window and couldn't see Daniel or Chloe so I asked him, "where's Daniel and Chloe?"  And he just said "I don't know."  I didn't expect any other answer from a 4 year old really.  Carter stood by the door for about 30 seconds and then said "oh look, there's puppy."  And by this he meant Daniel.  The like to pretend to be puppies and so he was kneeling down at the back door.  Carter opened the door for him and I asked "where's Chloe?"  He just said "I haven't seen here anywhere."  At this point I'm think what do you mean you haven't seen her anywhere?  She was just jumping on the trampoline with you about 5 minutes ago?  So I went outside and asked Tim if he knew where she went (because I wasn't able to see her anywhere in the back yard), and Tim just said that he thought she had come inside with me.  I was by the door inside and would have hear her come in, so I was pretty certain that she had not come inside.  At this point THE PANICK STARTS TO BEGIN.

I run around to the front yard calling to her, and she doesn't respond at all.  I look in the garage, and run around the other side of the house back to the backyard.  I tell Tim, I really don't know where she is.  He goes inside and starts calling to her and looking for her.  We told Daniel and Carter to run upstairs and start looking in every room and closet.  No response.  And the weird thing is that if she hears us calling to her, she usually responds, so I just started assuming the worse.  Absolute worse feeling EVER.  Chloe was missing.  I had no idea where she was, or if someone had taken her.  She isn't really a wonderer, she does get distracted easily and can start walking off but she usually realizes it before she gets to far away from us, so I didn't think she had wondered off.  So instead the only other thing that I thought really could have happened is that someone took her.

Tim went outside and started talking to neighbors to see if they had seen her.  Our neighbors across the street have animals and we thought maybe she went to see them (never had before, but maybe?)  We hoped.  But no sign of her, and they hadn't seen her either.  He looked through the front window of the car and didn't see her, the truck is too tall for her to open the door so she couldn't be in there.  My parents camping trailer is also to tall for her to reach the door as well as my dad's truck.  So Tim hops on his motorcycle to start driving around the neighborhood and look.  He knocked on most of our neighbors doors that live on our street to check with them.  No luck.

I had ran back around the house to look outback again.  I looked in the neighbors horse field, barn, by their puppies, and then I cut through their driveway out to 400 east to check if she wandered out there and just prayed that she wasn't hit by a car.  Still no sign of her.  At this point I am bawling and terrified and don't know what to do, and feel like the biggest failure ever.  It was horrible, and I was a mess.

I started walking on 400 east back home and Tim pulled up on the bike.  He hadn't seen her and I just said "what do we do?"  At what point do we call police?  All of this had happened in about 5-10 minutes, so it had only been about 15 minutes since I had last seen her.  Was that to early to call police?  But then again if she was kidnapped they could be long gone at this point, and every minute would be critical.  Tim just said that he was going to finish driving up 400 east so see if she went that way, because we know several people that live up that street.  I walked back home and our neighbors were still outside.  Suzee Jewkes asked if I had called the police, and I told her no.  She said that we needed to do that next, because the don't wait when it comes to children.  Every minute is critical.  She offered to call which I was very grateful, because I didn't think I could talk through the tears.  I checked on the boys again, and then decided it was time to call my in-laws to see if they could come and pick up the boys so that I could focus on looking for Chloe especially since the police had been called now.  I then walked next door to the neighbors because we hadn't knocked on their door yet.  We had looked in their backyard (because they have a fun backyard and she wasn't there), so I knocked on the door to see if she had gone inside to play with their kids.  Shelley Schwarts said that she wasn't there and that she'd check with her mom in the twinhome next door.  I went back with Suzee who had told police that we were missing a 2 1/2 year old girl.  Told them what she was wearing, what she looked like, and how long it had been since we'd seen her (10-15 min.).  I didn't hear the whole conversation that Suzee had with dispatch, but I'm assuming they said that they'd send someone out.  I walk back to the front yard, and then Tim pulled up on the motorcycle.

As all of this was going on, I still had Daniel and Carter inside that I had to worry about, so I never felt like I could wander very far to look for Chloe.  In between each time I ran outback or to a neighbors I'd come back and check on them.  They were so good to look for her though out the house, and then I told them to sit on the couch and not get off so that I didn't have to worry about them disappearing as well.  Daniel was such a sweetheart and everytime I'd come in and check on them, he'd ask why she was missing and would say "it'll be ok, don't cry." 

When Tim got back I updated him that we called the police, and that I had also called his parents to come and pick up the boys.  He said he had talked to everyone he saw outside just to see if anyone had seen a little blonde haired girl.  He hadn't had any luck though.  He just held me and at this point I think we both just thought that we needed to wait for the police and his parents to arrive.  I didn't want to call any other family, because I didn't really want to say the words "Chloe is missing" and accept that.  I wasn't ready for that.  We were just standing in the front yard holding each other, and I see a shadow in the car.  I said "Is that her in the car?"  Sure enough there she was in the back seat.  She had gotten in, but we have child safety lock on so she couldn't get out.  It was the first time in my life that I hated child safety locks, and tinted windows.  Tim had glanced in one of the front doors and didn't see her, but with the tinted windows and depending on if she was laying down or something, he couldn't see her.  And the fact that we always keep our doors locked...and they had been locked that morning, but Tim had taken Daniel on an errand that morning and gotten his carseat out of the car and had forgotten that we had been inside the car earlier that day.  We just assumed it had been locked so didn't open it up when we looked in.

Tim pulled her out and she was screaming, soaking in sweat.  I was so relieved and terrified all at the same time.  Chloe had been sick with a fever all week, so I was so worried about her health with being in the hot car.  It was probably about 80 degrees that day and the inside of the car was hot.  She was probably in there about 15 min, and I don't doubt that if it had been much longer then she would have passed out or could have serious health risks.  Tim took her inside to take care of her, and Daniel had come out and just hugged me.  He rubbed my back and said "we found her, it's ok."  He was such a sweetie.  I was glad we found her before police arrived, and Suzee called them back to tell them we had found her.  Tim's parents still came and picked up the boys so that we could take care of Chloe.  We took her clothes off her to help cool her down, gave her lots of water to drink as well as an otter pop, and then just held her close to us.

It took me the rest of the afternoon to really calm down and shake the uneasy feeling I had had earlier.  Truly one of the worst experiences ever, and I never want anyone to experience that.  The whole ordeal only lasted 15 to 20 minutes, but it seemed like forever.  I LOVE my children.  And even though we have to have trials that sometimes push us past what we think we can handle, I'm grateful for a loving Heavenly Father that was a comforter and guided us to our little girl.  It was a happy ending to what I thought only the worst had happened.  I am extremely grateful for my family, and know that we can be together forever.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Overview of the past 6 months

- We found out we are expecting baby #3 on December 21st.  We're adding another boy to our family and his EDD is Aug. 18th.
- We LOVED spending Christmas in Utah, and it just confirmed that we wanted to try to get Tim's externship back in Utah.
- Tim finished working for Rojo Hospitality and then spent a few weeks working for a new high end restaurant in Phoenix called Gertrude's.
- Daniel had surgery to remove a kidney stone that was to large to pass on his own.  He had to have it removed on his 5th birthday, which they treated him extra special for having to have surgery on his birthday.  He did amazing and recovered quickly.  Now we just have to have him drink lots more water so that he doesn't get any more
- Tim got accepted to do his externship with BYU dining services at the beginning of March, which meant we had one month to pack up and move before his externship started on April 8th.
-  Tim's grandma passed away the day we were moving back to Utah.  We are grateful for the chance Tim had to see her in March when we came for his interview with BYU, and we are grateful that we were able to make it back for the funeral.  We love and miss her, but are extremely grateful for all she taught us and for the good example she was to us.
-  Tim completed his first block of externship...only about 4 more weeks left of block 2, and he will be done with school!
- We've had many fun and exciting family events during the month of May including: William's (Tim's youngest brother) seminary and high school graduation, Patrick (Tim's brother) returned from his mission, William went through the Temple for the first time, family pictures, many family get togethers and several drives up the canyon! (we sure missed mountains while in Phoenix)
- Tim has applied for a full time position with BYU and we hope to hear about it soon.  If that doesn't work out, there are several other places that we are looking at applying at.
- Daniel loves being back in Utah where we are closer to family and friends.  He loves being able to go to friends houses to play and it's hard for me because sometimes I'm not ready for him to be "grown up" and go to friends on his own.  Why at just 5 years old do kids want to be so independent?  It's hard on the parents!  Daniel loves being around people and is very friendly and social.  He still loves star wars, playing the xbox, playing outside, running around, jumping on the trampoline, and pretty much anything active.  He is looking forward to going to school and spending more time with other kids.  He is finally starting to enjoy primary more, and loves learning primary songs.  His favorite primary song is Book of Mormon stories.
- Chloe is also growing up so fast and tries her best to keep up with her older brother...and she does a pretty good job at it.  She is our child that we can't let out of our site, because she either gets into things she shouldn't or disappears.  Last week we had one of the scariest days of our lives when she disappeared and we couldn't find her (another post on that to come).  She likes to tease her brother, loves to paint her nails, have her hair done in ponytails, play outside, wear her leotard and dance or do tricks, and she loves to sing.  She knows her alphabet, colors, shapes, can nearly count to 20.  She is so smart for a 2 1/2 year old, and acts a lot older than she is.

We are excited about summer, new job, looking for a place of our own, the arrival of our baby boy, school starting, and all the other exciting things that will happen this year.  It will be busy, but we love the time we get to spend together!

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

A few of my favorite things

by, Chloe McMillan

As I was trying to put Chloe in bed tonight, she had a complete meltdown.  As I was rocking her, I decided to just ask her a few questions to try to distract her.  It helped a ton and then I was able to lay her down.  I wanted to share/ remember her answers since there wasn't any promptings from me or anyone else.

I first asked her if she didn't want to go to sleep because she was scared, and she said "uh, huh."  So I asked what and she told me lion.  So then we had to say a prayer that she wouldn't see any lions in her dreams and she would be safe.  This really helped her calm down so I continued with some more question.

1.  What is your favorite toy?  Fish
2.  What is your favorite color?  Red
3.  What is your favorite food?  Meat, cheese, chips, chocolate
4.  What is your favorite kids show?  Dora
5.  What is your favorite movie?  Muppets

After these questions, she showed me that she was holding her favorite blanket and had her favorite binki, layed her hed on my shoulder and relaxed enough for me to put her in bed.  I love my princess and I thought I knew her very well, but even at such an early age she has suprised me and taught me that it's always important to talk to your children and really listen to them so that you hear their "voice" in life rather than just what you want to hear/ believe/ think.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012


Now that it's nearly November, we finally think it is starting to feel like fall.  Our weather has been around 85 degrees instead of 95 or 100.  So we have enjoyed a few fall activities which include...

1) Arizona State Fair

2) Perfect weather for a picnic at the park

3) Halloween/ Ward Trunk or Treat - I was lucky to get any pictures because they were so excited and just want to play with all the kids that were dressed up!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Busy, Busy, Busy

We have been super busy that I feel like I don't even have the time to update the old blog.  Tim is so busy with work and school that he's not home a lot, which leave me to wrestle the kids during the day, and doesn't leave much time for anything else.  We had an enjoyable summer, but it has still been hot here so we forget it is fall already. We are looking forward to some cooler weather in the next month though.

This last month has been pretty eventful for Daniel.  For almost a year now he has had times where there is blood in his urine.  We went to the doctors several times in Utah and they did tests, but everything would come back normal.  So just before we moved, his pediatrician recommended that we see a nephrologist after we move.  So since the blood happened a couple of more times we decided it was time to schedule that appointment.  More urine samples, blood test, etc.  One of the test tested positive for protein in his urine which concerned the doctor, but the next test showed it wasn't there anymore.  So we've kind of stumped the doctor, but he wanted an ultrasound done which we did this month, but haven't gotten results yet.  We have another appointment at the end of the month and will see what happens next.  The doctor is kind of thinking that it is IGA nephropathy (which is damage, disease or other problems with the kidneys) but the only way to diagnose it is with a kidney biopsy.  So if the ultrasound doesn't show anything, he'll most likely have to get a biopsy.  So we'll find out results on the 30th and go from there.

Other than that Daniel has been his energetic self.  And he has been saying some funny things lately, and tries using big words.  Some sayings by Daniel...

Talking to Chloe, he said, "pardon me, kind miss"

D to mom: Will you get me a drink and a snack?
M: Yes, but let me take Chloe up to bed first and then I will
D: You better hurry up quick before my tummy growls again.

D acting kind of figity and Tim asks "what's wrong?"
D: I just need to get out of this house

"My legs are killing me, we need to go to the pool."

"Dad, I hate it when you work all of the time"

One morning Daniel woke up mad, and when Tim went into his room he just told him to get out because he was mad at mom, and wanted to be left alone.  So I go into his room and said, "I heard you are mad at me?"  And he replied, "I am, cuz you forgot to get me a drink before bed."  And then I reminded him that I did get him some milk before bed, and he said "oh ya" and was perfectly happy after that.

"I got a bad feeling about this"

Chloe is our mischievous, fearless girl.  You can't take your eyes off of her for two minutes or she is getting into some sort of trouble.  If someone were to ask me what her two favorite things are, I'd probably tell them drawing on herself and ripping things.  Some mischief she's gotten into lately include: drawing all over herself, eating some of my birth control, rubbing shoe conditioner all over herself as if it were lotion, putting hydrocortisone on her lips, rubbing vicks on her cheeks, opening a bottle of robitussen (that has a child safety lid, but luckily didn't drink it), climbing on our entertainment center to stand right in front of the tv, rubbed bright blue toothpaste all over her face and arms, and other things along those lines (I think you get the picture).  But she is so cute while doing all of it.  It makes it difficult to get mad at her and she is pretty sensitive so if you do get mad it just makes her cry the saddest cry ever.  So she probably gets away with more than she should.  Chloe is also starting to talk in sentences and tries to copy words that Daniel uses, which makes it pretty cute/ funny.  She is growing up so fast and learning so much everyday, and we just love the cute toddler stage she is in!

My two trouble makers!

Thursday, August 16, 2012

July Pictures

Road trip!
I love how the cup is almost as big as she is, and that she is holding it with her foot as well!
Some July events include...4th of July fun (ward activity with slip-n-slide), California trip for Tim's great Uncle Bill, beach, and unpacking.

August Pictures

Tylyn and Shea
Beautiful cake that my sis-in-law, Susie made. If you need a cake, she's awesome. I can give you her contact info!
Me and the kids were able to visit Utah for my little sister's wedding. We were there for a week and the time went way fast. We enjoyed her beautiful wedding, Lindon days, dr. appointment for Chloe, hanging out with family, etc.